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Party Insatiable | Saints and Sinners Ball | Club True Blue | Attraction Dance Party | Wet on Wellington swinger's night | Attunga Parties | Colt's Club | Club Gemini | Stiletto's | | | Debauchery
Party Insatiable
Party Insatiable is fairly open about their intentions; to quote their web site: "This is a gangbang, not a couples party". They are not alone in being a swinger's party web site promising lots of hardcore sex. Fortunately, PI delivers, and in bucketloads (literally, at times). They're generally held in a quite secluded area about an hour's drive north of the CBD (although recently some parties have been held at a swingers' venue in Melbourne's west); the usual venue is a large, well-maintained house in a semi-rural area. Downstairs is a lounge, bathroom, kitchen, etc, and upstairs is a large play area. The first night I went I received a friendly welcome from all The Insatiables; they are definitely amongst the friendlier event organisers I've met. I have since been back numerous times.
Play usually starts abut an hour after opening. These guys really do not muck about; basically, there is no foreplay, just straight into the hard stuff. Being open to single guys, there are generally about 25-50 guys, five or six real girls, and a TV (me!). Things quickly degenerate (or evolve, depending on your point of view) into a series of small gangbangs spread throughout the room. Despite being 30km out of town, I suspect you could hear the screaming in the Bourke Street Mall.
On my first visit I was a little restrained; on my second I played a lot more, including with the lovely Tam- she is wonderful. Since then I've played with several of the real girls, and I've always really enjoyed myself with them. One of the really good things about this party is that their core group of ladies seems to cover the whole range of sexual possibilities: vaginal sex, anal, facials, etc. One young lady seems to specialise in oral, while another is a fisting afficionado.
I always hit the knees for a little while to blow a few guys, but I honestly don't think I make much of a dent in the sheer mass of pent-up sexuality in the room. I sometimes get a short queue of guys wishing to sample my talents forming, which is always gratifying.
One of the really pleasing things about PI is their attitude to bisexuality, which is accepted and encouraged. I have found this to be rare in the swing/GB scene. I have only got one knock-back from someone I came onto, which was good. Although a donation is required to defray costs, it is not unreasonable and stacks up very well against other parties which allow single males.
Last attended: June 2008
Positives: really hot action, especially if you like gangbang-style sex + reasonable contribution = good value
Negatives: might be a long-ish way to travel home late at night if you live in the far south-eastern suburbs- but definitely worth it.
Web site link here.
Saint's and Sinners Ball
[note: Saints & Sinners is not always at the same venue; this review has been written to be fairly generic and is composite of several different S&Ss]
This appears to be one of the biggest semi-frequent alternative-sexuality events in Melbourne, and it's probably also one of the highest-profile. I'd heard quite a bit about Saints and Sinners, from a variety of people. I try to approach such events with low expectations and a 'lets- just- see- what- happens' attitude, so I was looking forward to it but trying not to get too carried away. On the night, however, I enjoyed myself out of all proportion to my expectations; I had an absolutely awesome time.
The venue was an inner-city nightclub with several levels. Upon arrival, we were directed to a cloakroom to remove excess clothing such as... well, most of it, really. I was planning to wear a PVC top, but it was just too hot so I took it off and just wore the mesh top I had underneath. There were two dance floors, one downstairs playing commercial pop/dance, and one upstairs playing house/dance. A mezzanine level featured a pool table and an area with a lot of bean bags, but oddly I didn't see a television to watch while sitting in the bean bags1. There was a bar on each level.
So why did I have such a good time? Several reasons, and the (slightly average) music wasn't one of them. Firstly, for me, size does matter; the number of people who are into tgirls (while not tiny) is relatively small, so a larger party gives me more opportunities to find playmates. This probably applies to everyone else too; if there are more people at a party, then you've got a better chance of finding someone you click with. Secondly, I like seeing people's outfits; some spend heaps of time and effort on their outfit, and I love to see the results. There were some truly amazing outfits and if you like that sort of thing it's probably worth the admission price for that alone. Thirdly, they're tgirl-friendly, which is always nice- soooo many places aren't.
A couple of safety points: firstly, safe-sex supplies are not obvious. What the fuck!? Apparently some are provided, but I couldn't find them. I find this, frankly, appalling. At an event like this I expect to see condoms all over the place, and preferably a safe sex poster or two as well. Contrast this with the hard-to-miss safe-sex message found in many gay saunas and some swingers parties like Party Insatiable or Attunga Parties. The lack of accessible condoms at a fuck party is just ridiculous; it's like handing people a hot barbeque sausage without a piece of bread to put it in- sooner or later, someone's fingers are going to get burnt. If you're going, it's probably best to take your own condoms, until the organisers fix this ridiculously inexcusable oversight2.
Secondly, at least two of the venues this party has been at have had really steep metal staircases. That might be something you consider when making footwear selections.
1 Much to my amusement, later in the evening one of the bean bags developed a tear while a couple was shagging on it, and the little white polystyrene balls kept flying out in time to the thusting, like a never-ending ejaculation.
2 And before you whinge 'but it adds to the organisers' costs', yes, that's true. Condoms retail for about 50 cents each (I assume less in bulk) so if a party has 750 patrons, or say 400 males, each using an average of three condoms that's 1200 condoms. At 50c per condom that's $600, or (at $50 per ticket) about twelve people's entry. I reckon that's probably about 1.5% of the overall budget. You might say that people should take responsibility for their own safety, but the organisers are making a profit from this and I think they have a moral and ethical responsibility to provide a safe environment. You wouldn't buy a car without seat belts, would you?
Last attended: October 2007
Positives: Freakin' awesome... I'm not sure what else I can say. If you're into the swinging scene you really should go to this, even if it's just once to see what it's like. I'm always looking forward to the next one.
Negatives: Unfortunately, the lack of a really clear safe-sex message is both obvious and easily fixed.
Web site link here.
Club True Blue
Is this the best house party in Melbourne? Perhaps not, but if it's not then it must be pretty close. I was thoroughly impressed with Club True Blue. I had been a little hesitant about going at first, because it's located a really long way away from where I live. Nonetheless, I made the trip out and was very pleasantly surprised. The venue is located in a quiet area, very close to a main road with freeway access, so it's easily accessible by car. It's a large, well-maintained private house with a pool table, covered smoking area, lounge, open kitchen, and several playrooms. The hosts are very friendly and certainly seemed to know how to run a party, and they weren't sleazy or money-oriented (as a minority of party hosts unfortunately are). They could both hold a conversation and seemed quite personable.
The evening I'd gone was a bi night, and there were six to eight couples and about five single guys, all well-presented. After a reasonable period, someone suggested that we start playing, so four of us (a single guy, a couple, and myself) headed to one of the play rooms. We attracted a bit of attention, but there wasn't the sense of putting on an exhibition. Being a bi night, some of it was a little no-holds-barred, but that was good. I felt that there was the possibility that some of the single guys perhaps weren't getting into the action as much as they could have; I'm not sure why that was. All in all, it was a really, really good night and I had a great time. I assume that their couples-specific evening is just as hot.
Last attended: June 2008
Positives: really good group of people; excellent venue; friendly hosts
Negatives: distant location from most people, although good freeway access makes this bearable.
Web site link here.
Attraction Dance Party
Attraction is run by Rob and Tracey from Attunga Parties in the inner north. The first Attraction was held in a Chapel Street venue, after a late change of venue from a CBD nightspot, and the second in a CBD nightclub. It follows a similar format to the well-known Saints and Sinners Ball, although on a smaller scale. I was happy to see a wide variety of people, with perhaps a slight bias towards the younger and prettier. Unfortunately, however, there did seem to be an unusually high number of dickheads at the second party. My gaydar also told me that the crowd was relatively straight, which wasn't really surprising. Because Attraction gets all sorts of people coming along, including people who aren't experienced in the scene, things are usually a little slow to warm up. Eventually, someone always starts playing and provides an example for the rest of us to follow. After that, it's on, although in a fairly discreet, lower-key fashion than some other similar events.
I sort of think Attraction has a bit of an identity crisis. Although it's marketed as an erotic dance party, if you're a serious dance music freak then it leaves a lot to be desired (they keep interrupting the dance music with competitions and poorly-executed transitions between tracks), but sadly as an erotic event it also left me a bit cold. Saints & Sinners can get away with having only 20% of their patrons actually playing because they've got so many of them; at Attraction, it really looked like not many people were playing at all, although it was probably the same percentage as Saints. I enjoyed the first Attraction much better than the second one, so I hope that Rob and Tracey can make Attraction's third outing more like the one they ran in Chapel Street.
Last attended: May 2008
Positives: Good mix of people, accessible for inexperienced players.
Negatives: Some venue-related issues; play is a bit slow; there are sometimes a fair smattering of idiots; and some of the staff, entertainers, and security are not exactly top-notch performers.
Web site link here.
Wet on Wellington swinger's night
WoW's swinger's night is organised by a lovely gentleman named James. I was pleased to see that he was consistent in treating tgirls like real girls- I was not allowed to come unless I found a gentleman to take me. This total consistency is refreshing and there should be more of it. Anyway, this evening was really good. Wet on Wellington is a gay sauna in Collingwood; there's a swimming pool, some saunas, and steam rooms downstairs, with a small courtyard. Upstairs is the de rigeur maze of small cubicles with vinyl couches, one or two group sex rooms, and a couple of video lounges. My prinipcal criticism of the venue is that the maze upstairs is easy to get lost in; this can make it hard to rejoin stray partners or a particularly hot bit of action if you've had to duck out for a wee. Nonetheless, there was plenty of action upstairs for most of the evening.
There was a good range of people there, although obviously they were mostly straightish couples. However, I was a little bemused that there were a certain number of apparently single guys who were playing, and a certain number of apparently single girls who weren't. While I don't wish to cast aspersions, I did find this somewhat interesting, if you catch my drift.
All in all, a very worthwhile way to spend an evening and I highly recommend it.
Last attended: February 2007
Positives: really good range of play partners, great venue
Negatives: the chlorine from the pool might not be great for a tgirl's hair, but never mind
Attunga Parties
Attunga Parties is held in the inner northern suburbs, and they're marketed as a swinger's party although they also have gangbangs and open nights for single and/or bi guys, which also seem to attract a few TVs. The earlier part of the evening is party-like. There seemed to be a reasonable number of couples there (at least half a dozen) even at one of their singles/bi nights. Happily for me, many of the couples don't seem to mind playing with TVs as well.
Attunga is held in a terrace house-like venue close to main roads. They have previously operated from other premises, which occasionally overheated. However, the organisers are quite friendly and seem willing to accomodate guests' wishes, but I noted that there was a definite distance between the hosts and some of the guests; this is a well-organised event and the hosts certainly know their role. Like Party Insatiable, I was really pleased to see an enlightened attitude to bisexuality. If you're after guys but don't want to go to a gay venue, this is a good place to go.
Last attended: March 2008
Positives: convenient location. Reasonable contribution for single guys. Plenty of bi guys if you're into that.
Negatives: gender balance at the bi/singles night may need some work. Some parts of the venue can get a little crowded at times, which can be both good and bad. Some guests don't know their party etiquette.
Colt's Club
Colt's Club, as a 'brand', has been running in various formats for many years now. The one I attended was a fairly standard gangbang/house party type arrangement, held at another party's venue. There were two play areas, a video lounge, and a smoking room. As far as I could tell, there were about five women and twenty or so guys, at the younger end of the scene. Safe sex supplies were happily very evident.
My principal negative about the evening was that one woman who attended left suddenly, dragging her partner out the door with her. It wasn't clear to my precisely why she left, although it might be that she was simply an unenthusiastic participant in a plot hatched by her partner and decided she didn't want to play any more. While that's not unheard-of or surprising, I was disappointed by the attitude of the party organiser, which was basically 'well, fuck them'. I'm not privy to what other conversations might have taken place, but you'd think they'd at least be curious to see why they left. While I don't expect party organisers to be Mother Teresa, I do expect them to show some concern for their guests' well-being.
I'd have to say that on the evening I went, the whole thing didn't grab me. I can't tell you why it didn't grab me- it just didn't. Nothing particularly bad happened, but I didn't have a rip-snorting, swashbuckling shagfest of the kind that you might perhaps find at other similar parties. It didn't grab me in the way that I like sarsparilla, but Pepsi leaves me unmoved. That's not to say that I didn't simply attend on an off night (remember that each occasion is different, even when it's the same organisers and the same basic group of people) and that if I went back next time that things wouldn't be different, so I will have to go back in order to check this. Having said that, the woman I attended with has expressed much satisfaction with Colt's loudly and on numerous occasions, so it might just be me having an off night- which gives me an excuse to go back to check!
Last attended: March 2008
Positives: gangbang format suits my preferences well
Negatives: no specific negatives, I think I just had an off night
Stilettos
Stiletto's is roughly what I think non-scene people probably imagine a swingers' party to be. It's located in a private house in Melbourne's northern suburbs, about half-an-hour from the CBD. There's a lounge, two play rooms (one with a massage table), kitchen, and a smoking room. They advertise themselves as being open to single guys on Friday nights, aiming for a 2M:1F ratio. On the evening I attended (a Saturday) they seemed to have some single guys but mostly couples. I think I may have been a bit of a novelty on the evening I went, as some people didn't know what to make of me. There certainly seemed to be quite a number of first-timers there, which is always fun because it gives me someone to, ahem, educate.
While it's not a blindingly excellent rip-snorter of an evening, I have never had a bad time there either. It's a good, solid, dependable evening where you can be sure you'll have a good time, with very friendly hosts who are welcoming to first-timers.
Last attended: April 2008
Positives: friendly atmosphere, very easy parking, dependable play
Negatives: slightly crowded play area, and (unsurprisingly) rather a lot of people in the smoking room
Web site link here.
Club Gemini
Club Gemini is Apparently in recess; if anyone has any further information, please contact me. It is a little while since I've been to Club Gemini, so I won't go into huge detail. Suffice to say that when I last went, a couple of years ago, it had been going for quite some time quite successfully. Basically, it was a very relaxed, 'get-to-know-you' kind of party, with very little of the action in your face. Although everyone was obviously cruising (why else would you go?) it was subtle and restrained. Action takes place upstairs, with the option of getting a room to yourselves and closing the door to avoid prying eyes. There is also the possibility of MMMMF action if you're into that. What attracted my (inexperienced) partner to it was that there was no requirement to wear erotic dress, which she felt was a bit tacky.
Last attended: 2004
Positives: freeway-convenient location, reasonable contribution. The low-intensity environment may suit beginners
Negatives: looks like a commercial operation (I don't think it is, it just looks that way). May not suit experienced or hardcore party fans who are looking to jump straight into the action.
Debauchery
Review coming soon