Glossary
Disclaimer
Site map
Contact me
There is some variation in both the philosophy and practice of admitting single guys to swingers parties and other alternative-sexuality events.
If one accepts the standard definition of a swingers' party, ie: a party for (usually MF) couples to swap partners, it is of course not surprising that single guys would not be allowed in large numbers. With more organised, regular parties, single males are generally limited in number, require extremely expensive tickets, or are barred completely; single females, on the other hand, may be free. With many clubs, single guys are accepted on Friday nights only and Saturday nights are reserved for couples. Tickets for single guys can be up to A$100; that gets you entry, and is not a guarantee of finding a willing lady1.
Having said that, there are a small number of parties which do allow single guys without restriction. Clearly, some of these are walking a fine definitional line (not that it actually matters) between swingerdom and gangbanghood. Some are specifically described as gangbangs; there is obviously much wider scope for single guys to attend a gangbang than a strictly-defined swingers party.
If there are restrictions, there is no point in paying either a friend, or a "friend", to come with you so that you can get in the door, after which she leaves; most places will require couples to leave together, so you'd be asked to leave when she did anyway.
If you do make it to a party, be sensitive to the relationship needs of couples. A couple playing with another single person may not necessarily appreciate you joining the scene. You may get a negative reaction from a partner, which in extreme cases may see you asked to leave the venue.
I have heard it alleged that some organisers have paid prostitutes to attend swingers' parties in order to improve the gender balance (allowing them to take more single males) but I have seen no direct evidence to support this; it doesn't seem to make financial sense anyway. If you happened to get into this situation, then you would have to make an ethical judgement about whether you felt it was appropriate to play with someone who was getting paid for it.
1 Personally, I would have thought that if you're simply after sex, then for A$100 you could subscribe to an online dating/personals website for three months, or pay a lady of the night. The website gives you hundreds of low-probability chances, while going to a brothel gives you a 100% chance of getting off once. Obviously, that's a cold, hard view of things.
First-timers
Etiquette
More information: